Traffic got you down? Neighborhood bully getting on your nerves? Terrorist cell in your back yard? Need something to get you to the Sarlaac Pit in style for a lazy Saturday execution?
Now there’s a solution!
The JL241 Badonkadonk Land Cruiser/Tank is the answer to all your problems.
Supplies are limited! Order today!
At less than the price of a Hyundai, this little tank is a steal. Don’t take my word for it, though. Check out the reviews from the customers:
I am an acquisitions officer for an artillery unit in the Russian Army. Since mafia hooligans stole all of our equipment to sell to Kyrgyzstani rebels, we have been looking for a low-cost alternative to the T-80 Main Battle Tank. After successful trials at a facility in Moscow, this so-called “Badonkadonk” was approved for use in the Chechen theatre. Initial reports were favorable, but then somebody noticed that the tank lacked a cannon, treads, and armor, and possessed the engine of an electric bicycle. It did, however, have an excellent audio system, but this failed to compensate for its disappointing 100% mortality rate. Recommended only for use against Lithuanians.
Another customer writes:
The gas mileage isn’t that great, but I haven’t stopped for a traffic light/stop sign for the six months I’ve owned the JL421. Actually, I haven’t even bothered to slow down….people just seem to get out of the way. The police escorts have been a welcomed suprise, but they would be more efficient in front of me instead of following behind.
Get yours today!
(Seriously, this is a real product for sale on Amazon. Go read the customer reviews. They’re hilarious.)
Don’t forget to get the “pimped out” options…