Posts Tagged ‘funny’
Tetris humor
Monday, January 7th, 2008This post is like a bunch of words on a piece of paper, except it’s electronic
Friday, November 30th, 2007Taken from the Nov 30, 2007 edition of Mikey’s Funnies
WORST ANALOGIES…EVER
Part 2~ The brick wall was the color of a brick-red Crayola crayon.
~ I felt a nameless dread. Well, there probably is a long German name for it, like Geschpooklichkeit or something, but I don’t speak German. Anyway, it’s a dread that nobody knows the name for, like those little square plastic gizmos that close your bread bags. I don’t know the name for those either.
~ He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.
~ The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.
~ The politician was gone but unnoticed, like the period after the Dr. on a Dr Pepper can.
~ He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.
~ The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn’t.
~ From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in another city and “Jeopardy” comes on at 7 p.m. instead of 7:30.
~ Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair after a sneeze.
~ Her eyes were like two brown circles with big black dots in the center.
~ Her date was pleasant enough, but she knew that if her life was a movie this guy would be buried in the credits as something like “Second Tall Man.”
~ Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.
~ John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
The bowling ball one kills me. That sounds almost exactly like a line from a Douglas Adams book… that I can’t precisely remember at the moment.
I also like the movie analogy. That got the point across completely, I thought, and was humorous to boot.
The others just hurt. But still funny.
Related posts
Wheel of Lunch!
Thursday, February 22nd, 2007So your co-worker comes over and says, “Hey, you going to lunch today?”
You say, “Sure. Where do you want to go?”
“Well, there’s Joe’s Chicken Shack, or The Hungry Heiffer, or Plantation Station, or Pizza Pizzaz, or Colonel Kluck, or…”
“Wait, wait… too many choices! How can I possibly decide?!”
Just then the overly eager colleague in the next cell (… um… cubicle) pops his head over the wall and says, “I know! Use the Wheel of Lunch!” Then, just as suddenly, he disappears behind the wall again.
“What a great idea!” you say, and spend the next 45 minutes spinning the wheel just because it’s so much fun before realizing you just used up your lunch hour. Your disappointment is slightly lessened by the knowledge that you used an application with lots of pretty colors and justified the existance of a Web 2.0 programmer with too much time on his hands. Perhaps tomorrow you can eat.
Technorati Tags: Wheel of Lunch, eating out, food, restaurants
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Stephen Colbert, a Greenscreen, and ILM
Thursday, October 12th, 2006Star Wars: Community | ILM’s Greenscreen Challenge Entry
Stephen Colbert, of the Comedy Central’s Colbert Report, issued a challenge to the public at large to put his lightsaber antics in front of a greenscreen into a full battle with monsters.
ILM picked up the challenge and ran with it. The result: butt-kickin’ Jedi political commentary.
And it came in second place!
Go to the Colbert Report site to see the winner, and some other great footage from the show.
Technorati Tags: Colbert Report, Star Wars, Greenscreen, lightsaber, comedy, Comedy Central, George Lucas, ILM, Jar Jar Binks, YouTube
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